Lost weekend.
I remember the Christmas party Friday night.

I have an egg nog dependency.

I can no longer deny it. Not after missing Christmas. Completely.

Know any inexpensive rehab clinics in the D.C. area?

As a last-minute stocking stuffer, I again recommend the wonderful Amy Sedaris book.

No.2 at this moment on Amazon top sellers. (Obama is no. 1)

My Christmas story:

Virgin birth, or, women don't need us any more.

A Komodo dragon in a British zoo is going to give birth to 8 babies around Christmas. No daddy. Parthenogenesis. Self fertilization.

I feel unnecessary.

I reek of egg nog.

I am Time's Person of the Year.

January Texas Monthly.

Barack Obama on MNF

Worth watching again.
He can act.

Borat's favorite director, Melvin Gibson, was No.1 at the box office this weekend with Apocalypto, a movie featuring pre-Columbian heart surgery.
Pushed Happy Feet to number two.

Just in: Rove resigns.








Barney new Presidential adviser.

Cynthia says goodbye.

On her last day as a Georgia Congresswoman, yesterday Cynthia McKinney introduced Articles of Impeachment against President Bush as well as Vice President Cheney and Secretary of State Rice.
For lying, not upholding our Constitutional rights, illegally spying on American citizens, etc.
They are guilty.

We at RichardEHead. com select Rep. Cynthia McKinney as our Congressperson of the year.

The 109th Congress went home at 3:30am this morning after passing 50 billion dollar tax and trade bills that we will regret.

Mary Cheney's baby will be 1/32 Native American, if my math is correct.

My grandmother was 1/2 Seminole Indian. She taught me the Florida State tomahawk chop as a small child.
I reveal this as it was announced today that the Seminole Tribe of Florida, 3300 strong (now 3301) has agreed to buy Hard Rock Cafe worldwide for $965,000,000. 124 Hard Rock Cafes, 6 hotels, 2 casinos.

I will be contacting my brothers and sisters on behalf of my child immediately.

I'm going to be a father.

I can announce it now that Mary has gone public with the news.
I want to make it clear: I did not have sex with that woman. It was artificially accomplished.

Mary and Heather will raise our child. I have agreed to very limited visitation.
They will, of course, select the kid's name. Not Richard, but I hear Gene is under consideration.
I could not be happier.

NASA has announced that we will have a lunar base by 2020.

So we can announce the real estate opportunity of the new century.

We at Richard E. Head.com have acquired rights to a parcel adjacent to the NASA site. We are offering 5-acre estate lots starting at $285,000.
Exclusivity assured in an upscale gated community.
Accepting $20,000 deposits starting January 2.

A burden was lifted from Halliburton's Kellogg Brown & Root subsidiary last week when the Justice Department agreed to a wrist-slap $8 million settlement for double billing and other fraud in contracts to support our troops in Kosovo way back in 1999 and 2000.
(When Dick Cheney was CEO, but had no knowledge of any such contract in the Balkans - or their offshore contract to supply Iran IRAN with oil field construction.)

Now all Halliburton needs to get past are the Nigerian bribery charges and Iraq fraud and Afghanistan fraud and then they can rid themselves of their remaining 80% stake in KBR by giving it away to unsuspecting shareholders.

Happy Feet rules.
No.1 for the third week in a row.

At last, something for us to be proud of.

Our poppy crop in Afghanistan broke all records in 2006. We grew 5,644 metric tons of opium poppies. We now produce more than 90% of the world's heroin.

Poppy cultivation was outlawed by the Taliban and almost eliminated by 2001.
See today's Washington Post

Possible residual hangover.